a required taste for the pretentious as all get out





all is not fair in love and karaoke
November 05, 2002, 6:40 pm

Go and do your civic duty, vote here.

No, not for Maryland Govenor, for the best entry in the Bears of Power sweepstakes!

Read all of the entries and give Booga your unfettered and completely unbiased opinion of the entry most worthy of a bear. No, seriously, vote for the best one!


There's a realtor named Betty Jo Morecock. No lie.

I am intensely amused yet deeply sorry for her.


I threw a party last night simply because I didn't have to go to school today, and it turned out to be a bad idea. Why? It wasn't because the karaoke machine was fired up, or because I lost in beer pong, but because I only want what I can't have.

I am very sensitive to injustice in the world, but I am a stickler for fair. As much as I hate the fact that the Yankees are pretty darn good, I have to admit it's fair that they win so often because they're good and they deserve to win; however, "The English Patient" as 1996 Best Picture? Ugh, you've got to be kidding me.

It doesn't bother me too much that my best friends Natalie and Amy get a lot of attention in bars because that's fair: they're drop-dead gorgeous girls who are a lot of fun and look damn good having it; however, when I know someone is absolutely, positively right for me and they're grasping on to someone who is a complete dead-beat, well, that's rating high on my complaint scale.

CNET brought his "girlfriend" who he likes, but not enough to my party. Instead of being giggly that he made it, I was pouty and out of control. Was I jealous? I'm not sure. Exhibiting signs of blind rage? Not exactly. I was overcome with sadness; a feeling I NEVER get at one of my parties, and I was floundering for a way to get out of my rut.

So I danced. And danced. And danced.

Andy sang karaoke while I shook my fat to everything from "Baby Got Back" to "Bye bye bye". I was damn good.

CNET thought the whole thing was hilarious. He laughed and laughed...not in a "what the hell" way, but a way that showed he genuinely appreciated how much I was enjoying being the center of attention. The girl, seeing CNET watch me, continued to pull at his arm, snuggle up to him, and otherwise distract him from admiring my freestyle footwork and shaking hips. Her attitude only caused me to dance harder and incited Megan's anger, causing Megan to declare loudly, "Isn't Jess hilarious? Isn't she the best dancer you've ever seen?" Megan rawks; she's down with the cause.

The girl turned down any requests for karaoke solos or bit parts during Smash Mouth's "All Star."

Now, given the circumstances, perhaps I'm being far too critical. We're a rough group when one is first introduced to us, and it's always intimidating to meet your other's coworkers, knowing full well that they know things you'll never be a part of or can discuss things that you'll never understand. And it was probably very hard for her to be there in the midst of all our revelry when she's pretty shy.

But he's not, and he's not happy, and I know this because he tells me it's true. He didn't want her to come, he said, because he doesn't want to mix worlds. He didn't want to have that pressure put on him because he didn't want to overexplain her or have her exist beyond him and her. That, I understand...

but to know that I'm better and for him to not pick me...that's not fair.

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