if you're going to san francisco, better say 'hi' to me on your way there
July 20, 2004, 10:38 am

California is a fantasy wonderland with weird food and too many baseball teams. If I'm exposed to ONE more Chicken Caesar salad, I will have to hurt someone. No one has any neuroses here. Everyone is too busy enjoying the soft breezes from the San Francisco bay and drinking Irish Coffees and stuff. Why is clam chowder so big? Why does everyone have a pool? Why is there a guy who claims to be "The World Famous Bush Man" on Pier 39 whose job is solely to scare tourists?

The good news is that my cousins are here. My cousins are awesome; they're the other two Biensoul sisters, just with California attitudes and waistlines. We will go two years, four years, six years without speaking and we're together, we're crazy alike. They drink as much as we do, they enjoy silliness, and they think Eddie Vedder is a god. (They also experienced the tub poop firsthand.

I've got to run, but you can get a preliminary report on my Vegas vacation from Blulinepaper...it's all true...except for some parts. I think it's pretty safe to assume that if I don't remember the entire conversation he details in the opening paragraphs, my memories of the rest of the night are sketchy at best. For example, I have Chad's phone number programmed into my cell phone. Do you know who Chad is? Neither do I, but I'm assuming he was the one responsible for the missing thong. ("I don't know A Chad, let alone many Chads that would necessitate an entire ENTRY." Heh.)