a required taste for the pretentious as all get out





a toast to the freshmen of 1992
November 13, 2002, 8:40 pm

In writing an email message to my high school amie, my college email drawer, and my one person that is connected by something that is beyond friendship and close to just the wavering thread of shared existence, Autymander, I noticed as I was yabbering on about (pronounced, of course, ah-BOAT) some of my students that nothing really changes; indeed, nothing has changed since we were 9th graders at the same school.

These kids, with their silliness and inanity and unhealthy obsessions with all things trivial and unpopular...they were no different than us. We "discovered" "Whose Line is it Anyway?" in 1992; we "discovered" SNL far before anyone else in high school, just as these students claim to have now. We toed the delicate line between outrageously great students, smart, witty whippersnappers and potentially dangerous and threatening teenagers. We laughed at everything, challenged nothing, and procrastinated our asses off while getting As easier than making powdered lemonade. There still is, in my classes lo these ten years later: an outcast, a smartass, a stupid kid, and the delightful hodge-podge in between (weren't these distinctions the fodder for all Hughes' films of the 80s?); all complaining about the same teachers that we did; all fighting the same community and decidedly blue-collar ways of thinking we fought. It's all very disturbing and refreshing and SIMPLE; I'm elated.

So here's to us, Corky Amanda, the one that made it out and the one that made it back in; let us never marry speed bumps. *clink*


I've been seeing a lot of Hess commercials lately. Perhaps the Hess gas stations aren't the rage in Maryland as they are in other states; in fact, the ONLY Hess station I have EVER seen is the one in Timonium on York Road. I am more than familiar with their trucks that seem so popular in the holiday season; these trucks are the only association I have with them.

Is their entire income based upon these collectible holiday trucks? Do they only advertise this time of year for the trucks because the company runs off the revenue of the tin for the rest of the year?


"Well, Eric was saying inappropriate things about you, and some of the kids were making fun of him."


"Well, he said rather loudly, 'Ms. B. is freakin' hot!' I think he has a crush on you."

"Great. Now it makes sense why the kids were laughing so hard earlier today."


"Well, when I called roll, some of the kids were wondering where Eric was, and Russ said, 'He's cutting.' I said, 'Well, I'm sure Eric would never cut my class...' The kids lost it."

"Yep, that's probably why."

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