a required taste for the pretentious as all get out





the rock show was perfect! the play was a success!
November 14, 2004, 7:31 pm

"I need to tell you something, Ms. B."

"What's that?"

"This play f'in rocked. Thanks."

Oh, the play was adorable. The kids, ADORABLE, FUNNY, SWEET, and GRACIOUS. The audience laughed and hooted and hollered. The play was a success.

Not only did the play rock, but on Friday night we had about 250 people; I know that doesn't sound like a lot, but trust me, it is. Word has spread about our teeny drama program, and it's suddenly becoming "cool." It's a very exciting development, to be on the verge and at the same time the center of something terrific, and that's what it is. To see how this program has blossomed over the past few years, well, makes me feel needed.

I don't mean to toot my own horn, but BEEP BEEP.

After the play on Friday night (sixteen teachers attended), Lefty, Awesome A (new art teacher that is a ball of Asian sass in a pint-sized sassy body), Awesome A's boyfriend, and Christina and I headed to the watering hole for a celebratory drink. Agent Megan brought me flowers, which were nice, to which Lefty replied, "Um, I should have brought you flowers, B, I'm sorry." Yes, yes you should have.

Details of the night are fuzzy at best; I do recall (vaguely) a few shots of whiskey, my sister driving my car home, some debate over Lefty seeing my horrific legs that have braidable hair, and then waking up at 4:30am, realizing that a) I was on the floor, b) my nose was in Lefty's armpit, and c) my sister was on the other side.

"mmmawwarrwhere are gyouour goingggg?" (Lefty's drunk sleepy talk is hilarious)

"I have to go to my bed."
"I have to set the alarm for you so you can go to work tomorrow."
"mmmmmno." This is where his arms pinned me to the floor.

"YES!" I stormed upstairs to my bed and passed out, decidedly more comfy.

He doesn't like to wake up in the morning. He says, "Let's just cuddle for five minutes, Jess," and goes back to sleep. The bastard.

Last night after the show, my asst. director and student teacher at school went with me, his cute friend Broch (heh), his wife, and his other friend to the bar, and after drinking several pitchers of beer, I sang "Sucked Out" with Jim on karaoke and we were AWFUL. Imagine the worst karaoke singer's performance in the world, kick it up about nineteen-million decibels, add a couple screams, and then have the fat girl knock over her beer in the middle. That was basically our set.

After karaoke I decided that Broch was indeed cuter than I had originally thought, flirted with him non-stop, and let him get directions to my house for my Ghettofabulous "Life Ain't Nuthin' But Bitches, Money, and a G Thang" party next Friday.

Lefty, you have competition; I sure hope you step up your game now, boy.

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