a required taste for the pretentious as all get out





on the eve of twenty-six
August 03, 2004, 7:39 pm

I turn twenty-six tomorrow.

When I was ten, I considered twenty-five to be quite grown up.

When I was fifteen, I decided that by the time I was twenty-five years old, I would be married with two kids and a successful career.

When I was seventeen, I wrote my obituary in my Human Relations class that stated that tragically, I would die in a horrific car accident at the age of twenty-five, surviving a fiancee and interrupting the pursuit of my doctoral degree.

When I was twenty, I thought that by twenty-five, I'd be living on my own somewhere very hip and cool and dating a performance artist. I also projected that by twenty-three I would have written The Next Great American Novel like Carson McCullers did with The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter.

When I was twenty-three, I thought by the time I was twenty-five, I would shop at the Gap on a regular basis.

When I was twenty-four, I wanted to at least save enough money to move out of my parents' house.

Here, on the last day of twenty-five, I look at twenty-six thusly:

Don't Make Any Promises That You Can't Keep.

Don't Make Any Goals You Can't Reach.

Don't Get So Drunk You Forget Your Name.

Don't Forget Where You Came From, No Matter Where You Go Next.

Don't Live Someone Else's Life.

Don't Eat That Chocolate Chip Cookie, or The Box of Chocolate Chip Cookies.

Do Be A Good Friend.

Do Tip Twenty Percent.

Do Move Out Eventually.

Do Remember that Twenty-Six Isn't Old.

Do Remember that People Love You.

There, that should do it.

In other news, Happy Birthday tomorrow to TheCritic!

Thank you for your notes and prayers for Yaya. She is home, she has a new knee and a blood clot in her lung, but, as always, she's a trooper. She's mostly tired of staying in one place, but she's been watching a lot of Law and Order, so life hasn't been that bad. It was very scary for a while, but she's recovering as best as can be expected.

"Did you write about me being sick?"

"Um, yes, and everyone is very concerned."

"Well, I don't want them to think I'm weak."

"I'm sure they don't."

"This is miserable."

"Well, you'll be racing down the street in Paris before you know it."

"I don't know about that."

"Please. You'll be fine."

"*sigh* Never get old, Jessica; it is no fun."

last - next